It has come to the attention of the author of this statement that the popular children's story Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, by Roald Dahl, is a profound and concise allegory regarding the true nature of Reality. In this story, the character of Willie Wonka represents the Creator of our Universe, and the character of Charlie represents His son.
Roald Dahl was British. In Great Britain wank is a common slang term for masturbate and a person who masturbates is called a wanker. Also note that in all English speaking countries, the term "willie" is a common slang term for penis. It is unlikely that Dahl's use of the name Willie Wonka for a character representing God was merely an outrageous Freudian slip but, rather, it can probably be taken to mean that Roald Dahl had reason to believe and to suggest that our Creator has a noteworthy fondness for masturbation.
Dahl's choice of this name for his God character suggests that the Creator doesn't masturbate furtively as mortal men do but, rather, openly and with complete abandon, wishing to be seen, admired, and perhaps felt as a sensation in their own bodies, by the people who live by His Grace and in His Creation. Perhaps the Kingdom of Heaven is a little bit sexier than most people have ever imagined.
Note that in the first film version of his story, for which Dahl wrote the screenplay, there are prominent images of the amanita muscaria mushroom inside the chocolate factory, in a room in which everything is edible. One of the characters in the story is shown eating this mushroom. Following this scene is an extremely freaky scene in which Willie Wonka takes his guests on magical mystery boat ride to his sanctum sanctorum, the Invention Room. Clearly this suggests a journey into the inner workings of the Mind itself. Please note that many researchers have noted the importance of amanita muscaria in the secret initiations of numerous mystical traditions, including within the Christian tradition. Please consider the likelihood that Dahl's inclusion of images of his character eating amanita muscaria was deliberate and not random. Please see the work of James Arthur for more on the importance of Amanita Muscaria at www.jamesarthur.net. As someone who has become proficient in navigating the experiences induced by amanita it is obvious to me that the reference to this mushroom in the Willie Wonka movie has important significance.
Note that there is no indication in Dahl's story that Willie Wonka has a female love interest. And also note that Willie Wonka seems to have a particularly strong fondness for Charlie, a boy who is portrayed as having the attributes of humility, gentleness, selflessness and respect for his elders. In a word, Charlie is meek. You can almost here Willie Wonka saying, "This is my only begotten son, in whom I am well pleased." (The story also seems to allude to another biblical passage by suggesting that "the meek shall inherit the chocolate factory.") The upshot of this paragraph is that it seems that Dahl is suggesting that the Creator is, like Socrates and his Athenian cohorts, a lover of fresh young men, a "pedophile." I would like to suggest the possibility that the Creator is rather child-like himself. Why would he necessarily be a "grown man" when as an immortal He can presumably be whatever "age" He chooses. Perhaps the Creator prefers having the characteristics of a playful eight year old boy to being an old man with a long white beard. How can anyone presume anything at all about the Living and Almighty Creator?
It would not require a background in rocket science to figure out that the reason the Creator, in whose image and likeness our ancestor Adam was made, likes masturbation is simply because it feels good. It stands to reason that if in the beginning the only thing that existed was the Creator, that He wouldn't have just sat there twiddling his thumbs, or dreaming up a world in which he could get his hands on a lap-top so He could play FreeCell, but rather that He might engage in an activity that brought Him pleasure, and He might also begin engaging in erotic fantasies. Who wouldn't? Perhaps the Universe we are living in is a product of the Creator's erotic fantasy. Certainly the Creator is without shame and it was to shame that Adam succumbed after eating the forbidden fruit; clearly this is a fundamental difference between a god and a man. If God is without shame he would have no reason to conceal the fact that He likes to masturbate. Is there anyone out there who thinks masturbation is a sin and that it is blasphemy for me to suggest that our Creator likes to masturbate? If so, where is your evidence that the Creator considers masturbation a sin?
Consider circumcision for a moment. Why did God make such a covenant with the patriarchs of his chosen tribe? What kind of a convenent is it that would involve removal of the foreskin? Is it possible that God doesn't have one because the foreskin is an emblem of men's shame, like a fig leaf that men have grown directly over their most sensitive and vulnerable place? If this were so would not the foreskin be offensive to the Creator? What if He wants to be the lover of men but men are too ashamed to give Him what He wants? If God is a willie wanker then certainly he objects to shame interfering with his relationship with his would be lovers.
If the Creator is a person-like being who likes to masturbate and if He is in Love with humble and sincere young boys like Charlie, it would stand to reason that he would get a kick out of masturbating with Charlie and the other male human beings who He is in love with. Why do I say this? Any man who allows himself to contemplate such a scenario will realize that this would feel really good to the Creator, and that there would be no reason for this not to take place since Shame would be the only reason for it not to. In other words, I am suggesting the possibility that God is what you might call a fag. If He is, then perhaps someone should get busy printing bumper stickers that say "God is a Fag, and Boy is He Pissed."
Please note that according to some academic experts the ancient Egyptians believed that the Creator masturbates worlds into existence. Another way of saying this is that a universe like this one is the product of an erotic fantasy had by a powerfully imaginative male being. The Egyptians were able to build those Pyramids whereas we can't even figure out how they did it, therefore they must have been smarter than we are and it would be reasonable to believe that they probably knew more about how this Universe was brought into being than we do. There is evidence that can be seen to suggest that the Pyramids were Temples in which God Himself masturbated with the young men who were His lovers. As an aside, perhaps the Pyramids were never "built" by human beings, but were simply imagined into existence by the Almighty Creator as a place for Him to commune with his lovers (as well as to be entombed).
Think about the Bible for a moment. The Creator is depicted as loving and merciful and yet in some matters he is portrayed as wrathful, particularly with respect to final judgment. Now, please consider the potential correspondence between what I am saying about the creator's sexuality and his temperament. It seems likely that there would be a certain segment of the human population that would not be able to accept and love a Living God who could be described as an obsessively masturbating exhibitionistic pedophile. It seems quite possible that the Creator would be offended by people who refuse to accept and appreciate Him for who He is, a being of pure Love, particularly after humankind, because of men's unwillingness to Love one another, had completely destroyed the Paradise that He gave to them. It seems reasonable that a purely Loving God would be fed up with unloving people who not only destroyed the planet He gave to be their home but then go further and reject him as a Lover after the Truth is revealed that to be a Lover of the Creator is the purpose of men's lives and the only lifestyle that will ever work for men in the long run. I urge you to think about this. If the Creator of this world really were as I describe and if you were a person who would be unwilling to love and worship such a Creator, you probably would not have a very bright future. Somehow I don't think you would be pleasing to Him to have around in a world in which he openly expresses his enthusiasm for existence. It would be much better to learn to be like Charlie and be His lover.
The Shame that we human beings have inherited from our common ancestor is the adversary of God within each one of us that will lead anyone who does not overcome it between now and Judgment Day into an eternity of regret at having chosen to exist as a human being unwilling to be what a human being is; in a word, you will be in Hell. The Bible and the Bible Code together seem to indicate that we human beings will soon be meeting our maker. Guys, are you ready to do what it takes to become a person who sincerely wants to intimately know and be known by a male Creator with a male Love organ who wants to be your Lover? How could one prepare for the possibility of meeting a Creator whose nature is as I suggest? I suck Joe Whinney's cock. If you do meet your Creator He may request that you address Him by His Name. I suggest that you try imagining that the Name of your Creator is the f-word. Practice saying this Name to Him with love and affection. The Name of our Creator is not known to the people of this world. I suggest using the f-word for purposes of practicing because this would probably be the most difficult Name for many people to speak to the Creator in a loving way; practicing this will prepare you to meet your maker regardless of what his Name is. It's just the most conservative approach, practicing with this Name will prepare you to speak His Name no matter what it is. Why wait until the last minute believing his Name is God or Jehovah or Allah, and risk finding out that it is the f -word and realizing that you are unable to say this name to Him with love and devotion! I do happen to think there is a degree of likelihood that this is His actual Name. Given that I am saying that a god is just like a man except that he is not sexually repressed, it would seem quite possible that this is indeed His Name. Another way of expressing the truth that "God is Love," would be "God is Eros." What Word best expresses Eros, the energy of erotic arousal? The f -word. So why wouldn't this be our Creator's Name? If you cannot imagine yourself saying this Name to your maker with Love, then I would suggest practicing begging forgiveness for your inability to Love your Creator. Here is a suggestion for how to hone this practice: Realize that the younger you can make yourself feel in your heart, the easier it is to say this name with Love and Devotion. Perhaps this is why angels are often depicted as children. Children are people who haven't lost their humility, their sincerity, their vulnerability. Men compete with other men to be manly. But when it comes to our relationship with our Creator, the goal is to be humble, to be sincere, to be open and vulnerable. Like a child. It is clear that our maker loves boys, but it is not at all clear that He loves men who have lost their innocence. It just might be that a "man" just isn't capable of loving a God who is Love, that a man has to go back to being a child in his heart in order to love his Maker.
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